The fuckwit blog

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Somer Solstise
Happy Summmer Soulstisce! Yes, I know that yesterday was officially the beginning of summer, but I was much too bisy being important to remember and Darla had to poke me.   Today actually has about a minute more sunlight, cause I have time on my hands to measure such things instead of trudging through this damned book, and it’s full moon tonight.
A very good and powerful night for hot monkey sex with jon-jon, I’m sure it will be magic and involve ritual sacrifice.  I also find that summer solstice is a good time of the year for taking stock of what you’ve accomplished already this year – piss off all my fans, watch my PA meltdown in public, get jon-jon his first long pants -  and what you want to do with the rest of the year – make more money, find a diet and exercise-free way to lose this damn baby fat even though Trinity is, well I cant remember how old.
The first crops of the year have been gathered for real, and I have really come a cropper myself once or twice already this year.   Goals met, people helped, new projects begun, nope didnt manage ANY of that stuff.   Sometimes deciding to piss off my fans and fill my books full of pointless meaningless sex is as important as deciding to reward myself for a job well done with some hot monkey sex with jon-jon.   No, is a valid answer, and I use it often – no jon-jon, not tonight, no Darla, I wont come to the message board, no publisher, I DO NOT need an editor.
I think most of our lives would be better if we said no a little more often to all the demands on our time and energies. The light lasts the longest today, the night the shortest, so jon-jon and I will have to be quick with the hot monkey sex tonight. It is traditionally a time of celebration, and great joy. At some deep level you all feel the magic of my hot monkey sex with jon-jon, I know you do!. We’re warm, we have food, and the long hard *insert euphemism for nob here* is far away. We feel the need to celebrate with some hot monkey sex, whether it is a vacation, or a cook-out. Whatever your version of celebration is go enjoy some hot monkey sex and think of me on this the longest day of the year.   *goes off to have hot monkey sex with jon-jon and a few of his little friends*
posted by ??? at 6:49 AM